#Wrestling

Wrestlemania 32 Week Part II: Wrestlecon + Shimmer #80 & more

Wrestlemania had finally come to Dallas. The 32nd installment of the annual spectacle, that has become a week-long celebration that includes community outreach events, a Fan Fest, a Hall of Fame induction ceremony & much more.
Orbiting that is the entire wrestling community – having the global wrestling audience literally all in one place, it’s the perfect destination for anyone currently or ever associated with wrestling to book appearances or their own events, creating a packed schedule that hemmorages the host city for fans to gorge on for almost an entire week.

So now on to Part II of our Wrestlemania 32 week adventure – If you haven’t had the chance to check out Part 1 for the unforgettable IHWE/NWA Parade of Champions event you can do so here –

Wrestlecon – April 3rd – Hyatt Regency Reunion Tower – Dallas, TX

So we started the day at the non-WWE fanfest called Wrestlecon – I saw non-WWE as while their were many former WWE alumni and current ambassadors & even a few Hall of Famers, the WWE endorsed fan convention Axxess was happening across the street at the Convention Center with the same production value and presentation of it’s television and PPV programs.
Here at Wrestlecon was a much more humble affair – Those that are no longer (or never have been) under contract with the WWE. It would be easy to be dismissive of the event and comparisons to that scene in the Wrestler where the main character finds himself at some old armory peddling his wares of yesteryear wouldn’t be too far off the mark. However, the vibe of the event couldn’t be more pleasant – The performers for the most part seemed to be happy to be there meeting with the fans and the fans couldn’t have been more thrilled to be there.
It was kind of surreal scene – it was like being backstage at an event just like 25 years later –

Just walking through you’d see legends from all sides (how many do you recognize in one shot in the picture above?)
This is a decidedly non-press event so we were not there as media but my nephew came down for the big show and his favorite wrestler is Rey Mysterio Jr so I brought him here in hopes to get him so face time with Rey.
We arrived at a strategic time as the Ring of Honor show was in full swing upstairs so we thought the lines would be minimal and we were correct, everyone that is except for Mysterio’s (sad face).
But their was still plenty to see:

Taeler Hendrix (left)
& Torrie Wilson (right)

Velvet Sky, Barbie Blank (Kelly Kelly in WWE)
Tracey Adams & Melina

Jasmine St. Claire (right)

 

 

 

Panel: Lance Storm. Missy Hyatt & more

Just as we were about to leave as Mysterio’s line showed zero sign of thinning we saw that a panel was about to begin featuring a couple of familiar faces.
For me namely, one Missy Hyatt, former female personality from my favorite territory, Mid-South wrestling.
My excitement level was albeit muted as following Missy on Twitter has been a sobering (for me) unpleasant experience to say the least.
At first it was fascinating as she would live tweet entire Mid-South episodes (presumably watching from the WWE Network) with invaluable insight.
It would always threaten to unravel to Batshit Crazy Land until it did & then when she started a series of unwarranted attacks on my friend Lynda Newton who performed as Dark Journey, that was the final straw.

My apologies for the bad film quality but if you look closely Hyatt is proudly (without irony) displaying her support for Donald Trump with pro-Trump campaign shirt.
No need to digress and she has sunk as low as she’s going to.

Rey Mysterio Jr.

That’s about as close as we got to Mysterio but I was able to introduce my nephew to Billy Gunn, who was super intense but ultimately very cool and welcoming.

Jake (nephew) & I (left)
Jake with Billy Gunn (right)

 

 

 

Shimmer Womens Athletes #80 Championship Tournament – April 2nd – Eddie Deen’s Ranch – Dallas, TX

This was a long time coming – I’m a huge fan of Women’s Wrestling, in fact, the female competitors are my favorites and I’ve wanted to attend a Shimmer event for a long time that features an all-female roster showcasing some of the best independent female talent in the world.
Today was that day, after leaving Wrestlecon we walked literally across the street to Eddie Deen’s Ranch – Only in Texas could you hold no less than three major wrestling events daily all weekend inside a BBQ restaurant, that just happens to be located in the heart of a downtown metropolis.
We were here, I was excited and as I’m checking in & getting my press credentials, the person I’m handing my I.D. to is none other than the extremely talented & unfathomably gorgeous Laura “Cherry Bomb” Dennis – The one wrestler I was hoping to see perform most at this event.

 

 

 

No idea why she was behind the ticket desk (& she wasn’t for long as soon she was in her gear and wrestling) but she got me all squared away as we headed to our seats. Taking advantage of this being a reputable BBQ joint, my nephew & I loaded up on the goods.
Sitting practically ringside, giant BBQ sandwich in one hand & a beer in the other about to finally get to see some of my favorites for the first time finally, all was right with the world.

This entire event was one big tournament to crown the first Heart of Shimmer champion, which was totally cool as that meant hopefully we’d get to see some of our favorites more than once.

1st Round: Cheerleader Melissa defeated Leva Bates 

Excited that this was the opening contest as I’ve wanted to see both of these performers compete forever. Leva Bates has really been making the rounds lately with appearances on TNA as well as on WWE programming at NXT under the name Blue Pants.
Cheerleader Melissa is legend in the indie-ranks – both wrestlers kicked major ass.

Heart of Shimmer 1st Round: Candice LaRae defeated Cherry Bomb 

So excited to finally see Cherry Bomb wrestle and sadly she got beat in the first round by another great performer Candice Larae.

Thankfully that wasn’t the last we’d see her however as she came out for an assist to her tag team partner in the next bout.

1st Round: Kimber Lee (SHIMMER Tag Team Champion) defeated Jessicka Havok 

Your seeing two world class athletes in Kimber Lee & Jessica Havok, both have wrestled all over the world & on American television.

..but my girl Cherry Bomb returns to save the day to get Kimber the win to advance in the tournament.

1st Round: Heidi Lovelace defeated Veda Scott 

Though I saw Veda Scott serve as special guest referee a few days before at the IHWE/NWA Parade of Champions event this would be my first time seeing her compete.

1st Round: Nicole Savoy won LuFisto 

Nicole Savoy, whom I wasn’t familiar with prior to the event (though obviously I should have been) dominated throughout.
After beating Lufisto in the first round she ran through Kimber Lee and Heidi Lovelace in the Semi-Finals

Intermission – 

During a brief intermission as I was getting another beer and using the facilities I noticed NXT star Bayley sitting in the back checking out the action in an obvious gesture of solidarity towards her fellow female competitors (& maybe even scouting out some of her future competition).
I spotted another NXT wrestler Sami Zayn in the back row on our side.

Semifinals: Candice LaRae defeated Cheerleader Melissa   

Heart of Shimmer Finals: Nicole Savoy beat Heidi Lovelace and Candice LaRae new champion to be crowned.

In the end Savoy took them all down after a great final battle against LaRae to be crowned the Heart of Shimmer.

Great, awesome & super fun event that I was very pleased I finally got to see in person. Another great perk of living in a Wrestlemania host city.
The entire event can be viewed here at –

Photos – 

Roy Turner

Wrestlemania 32 Week Part 1: IHWE & NWA Parade of Champions

Wrestlemania had finally come to Dallas. The 32nd installment of the annual spectacle, that has become a week-long celebration that includes community outreach events, a Fan Fest, a Hall of Fame induction ceremony & much more.
Orbiting that is the entire wrestling community – having the global wrestling audience literally all in one place, it’s the perfect destination for anyone currently or ever associated with wrestling to book appearances or their own events, creating a packed schedule that hemmorages the host city for fans to gorge on for almost an entire week.

NWA/IHWE Parade of Champions – March 31st – Ridglea Theatre – Fort Worth, TX

Starting things off was a local promotion IHWE – Partnering with the NWA in it’s current incarnation to put on the first (& one of the best) events all weekend long.
Designed as a continuation of a tradition in tribute to (pre-Wrestlemania 32) the largest & most notorious wrestling event in Texas history – the Parade of Champions in 1984 to honor the late David Von Erich who had just passed earlier that year to honor the eldest brother of the Von Erichs, the most famous wrestling family in Texas wrestling history.
This would be my third IHWE event as I found something of a kindred spirit in promoter David Fuller as we share the same grassroots upbringing & passion for 80’s style wrestling & nostalgia. Listeners of our TrickyKid Radio Podcast will tell you that we’ve been hyping/supporting this event for weeks leading up to it.

What got me to my first IHWE event a few years ago was an appearance from the legendary Jim Cornette – One of the most unforgettable characters & outspoken managers ever to do it. Leading the Midnight Express during their classic feud with my favorite tag-team of all time the Rock N Roll Express, perfectly frames my favorite time in pre-Wrestlemania wrestling history & the time of my childhood I’m most nostalgic for.
So I was very excited to learn that Cornette was returning to start the program with a 2-hr No-Holds-Barred Q&A.

Jim Cornette

Fearless in his opinion and notorious for his full disclosure, Cornette wove irresistable tales filled with insider information the older fans crave.
It was laced with too much profanity for my taste as I will always equate Cornette with my 9 yr old self and like to keep it that way haha.
At times it devolved into more complaining and he seemed bitter and came off the rails a bit of “Adults arguing over a “fake” sport” but it was consistently entertaining & at times downright fascninating.

Making it all the more special was that the Q&A was moderated by legendary journalist & wrestling historian Bill Apter, who also conducted some of the backstage promos and was honored himself later in the show as he was (rightfully & deservedly) inducted into the Southern Wrestling Hall of Fame.

Bill Apter (left w/ Bobby Fulton)
& (right w/ Steve Anthony)

Apter’s contributions to Professional Wrestling can’t be overstated and I couldn’t even begin to exagerate the influence Inside Wrestling, The Wrestler & the flagship Pro Wrestling Illustrated had on me as a young person. I used to pour over them memorizing entire issues. Since the local paper didn’t recognize wrestling as a legitimate sport they didn’t report on it and this being pre-internet, the ONLY WAY to follow along was through the magazines. This was during the territory days of the 1980s and if you lived outside the territory it was the only way to know what was happening in other parts of the country. They were essential to the wrestling experience and hunting down new issues and agonizing over them for hours are some of my favorite memories ever as a child.
Apter just released a book Is Wrestling Fixed? – I didn’t know it was Broken detailing his unparalleled career documenting pro wrestling.
I was gifted a copy last month by my mother for my birthday that Bill took great care to personalize for me and wish me a Happy Birthday.
One of the secrets to Apter’s success is he is as kind as he is generous with his time. We hope to soon have Mr. Apter as a guest on TrickyKid Radio – stay tuned.

Ok,so on to the matches – this card was stacked and easily the best produced event this promotion as undertook to date.
Held in the perfect choice of venue the historic Ridglea Theatre where I’ve seen literally dozens of concerts.
It was perfect fit for the action that just had magic in the air from start to finish.

Americos challenging Ashton Jacobs for the IHWE Championship

Battle Royal to determine No. 1 Contender for NWA National Title

NWA Women’s Champion Amber O’Neal defending her title vs. Jessica James (w/ Special Guest referee Veda Scott)

The Woman’s Title event mirrored Wrestlemania as it was one of, if not THE best match of the night. Both competitors put on an amazing bout and added with the star power of Ring of Honor & Shimmer sensation Veda Scott put it totally over the top.

INTERMISSION

One of the things I love most about these local independent shows is that they take an intermission like when I was a kid.
During that time they have a mini-fanfest with tables setup in the back for the performers to sell their merch and for the fans to meet the wrestlers.

Jim Cornette

He may be outspoken and ornery as hell but it would be difficult to find a nicer and more welcoming personality than Cornette especially with the fans.
Gracious with his time and always grateful for the support and the attention.

Current IHWE Ring Announcer Travis Baxter w/ the voice of World Class Championship Wrestling Mark Lowrance (left)
& me fanboying out with Bill Apter blessing my mother’s birthday gift with a personalized note (right)

Women’s Wrestling – 

As I mentioned above, Women’s Wrestling was proudly represented at this event with some great talent. As any reader of this site knows that for the most part Women’s Wrestling thanks to the unbelievable talent uprising of the last 5 years has become my favorite aspect of the sport. If I were to list who I believe are the best wrestlers in the world currently, regardless of gender, more than half would be women.

Veda Scott (left)
& April Hunter (right)

Merica Strong (left)
& Hannah Michelle (right)

Merica Strong made quite the impact and was one of the most talked about performers of the event.
In the very first bout of the evening she turned heads & dropped jaws with a powerful presence casting a tall imposing shadow reminisecnt of Chyna (RIP).

Getting some advice from Ricky Morton (one half of the aforementioned Rock N Roll Express, my all-time fave tag team – left)
& Though she was only accompanying a tag-team to the ring, all eyes were on her (right)
She has all the tools & the perfect look for longevity in this industry, we hope to have her as guest on TrickyKid Radio soon – stay tuned.

The Main Event – NWA World Heavyweight Title Bout

Jax Dane (w/ Black Bart) defends against Charlie Haas (w/ Jim Cornette)

A great match loaded with star power to cap off an already incredible card filled with immense talent that kept that special vibe that it was all coming together.
Jim Cornette returned with NWA Champion Jax Dane to defend his title against former WWE Superstar Charlie Haas.

Dane had wrestling legend Black Bart in his corner that gave the match & show that great traditional feel it was going for.
Even Rick “The Sign Guy” Achberger was in the house (in the front row as per usual).

Only in wrestling could a fan get over as big as the performers. Opposite Achberger was another fan, Masanori Horie, who readers of Mick Foley’s books might remember. I didn’t know who he was till I saw him backstage later and got him & his girl a cab back to their hotel. I saw them come in & get ushered to ringside seats like royalty & I’m thinking this some Japanese wrestling legend only to find out that he’s more infamous than famous.
No disrespect but only in wrestling would that happen and that’s part of it’s charms.

Haas playing a great heel was once one half of “The World’s Greatest Tag Team” under the tutelage of Kurt Angle in the WWE.
He is often taunted that the other half of the team, Shelton Benjamin was much better as an on going gag.
Fed up with these taunts, Haas decides to bail on the match…..

….when as he is now being forced to walk back through the curtain (backwards) we see that’s it’s unthinkably Shelton Benjamin that’s forcing him back to the ring in that amazing old school 80’s wrestling that gave the fan the notion that literally anything could happen.
It sent shock waves through the entire building who responded with the preferred wrestling exclamation chant – “HOLY SHIT!”
Freaking glorious and just put the event that much over the top.
Congratulations to David Fuller & IHWE along with the NWA for putting on such a great event to start Wrestlemania weekend.

Epilogue:

After the show I went backstage to thank David Fuller and got sidetracked getting a cab for Horrie (see above) you could hear Cornette a mile away going off on one of his notorious rants. I turned the corner to see literally the contents of the entire locker room cramming in to get an earful.
I had no idea what or whom he was going on about but it was such a great moment, thinking like a photographer I wanted to capture it.

Shelton Benjamin (left)
& when Jim Cornette speaks – EVERYONE listens (right)

With my SLR camera’s battery long dead from shooting for over 10 hrs I just simply took out my cell phone that was almost just as dead & snapped off a couple of quick shots, determined not to ruin, compromise of interrupt this great moment. When Benjamin sees my cell phone & as I’m putting it back in my pocket, he begins to demand I delete it. Confused, I stalled to get clarity when he starts yelling at me to delete it.
Again, being naive I had no idea that he thought I was one of those parasites that records celebrity conversations when they find themselves dining next to them or some shit. Ironically, Cornette grabs me and shouts “Nooo, don’t delete it, I want the whole world to know what I just said!”.

I explained to them both that:
A) I didn’t record anything as that would be freaking creepy.
B) I had no idea about literally ANYTHING they were talking about

Shelton was cool after that but it was a tense moment. Good times.

Don’t miss IHWE’s next big event on May 29th in Crowley, TX

Photos –

Roy Turner
Andy Landauno

Boom Boom Girls of Wrestling

Recorded in Downtown Los Angeles, great talk with The Boom Boom Girls of Wrestling Director Caroline Von Petzholdt.
Caroline is also a professionally trained wrestler who made this awesome feature based upon her experiences in the often wacky world of professional wrestling.
This episode was also filmed for our first edition of TrickyKid TV – Go to Youtube.com now to subscribe & see the trailer for Boom Boom Girls of Wrestling!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download ()

Inside the 50th Annual Cauliflower Alley Club Reunion

The Cauliflower Alley Club, it is a non-profit fraternal organization, comprising both retired and active professional wrestlers and boxers (and in some cases, Hollywood stars as well) in North America. It raises funds primarily to help those in need of medical assistance, especially since the older wrestlers did not have health insurance in their primes. It was with great anticipation that I headed to Las Vegas for their bicentennial celebration.

Cauliflower Alley Club 50th Anniversary Reunion – April 12-15th – Gold Coast Hotel & Casino – Las Vegas, NV

As a life-long fan of Professional Wrestling making my way to Las Vegas to attend the legendary Cauliflower Alley Club’s 50th Anniversary Reunion was something of a pilgrimage for me. I enjoy the current WWE product & have since the Wrestlemania era began, but at heart I’ll always be an old-school guy & that’s what this convention is all about. I grew up in Arkansas & Texas so for me, no matter what has transpired in the last 30 or so years when I think of wrestling my mind always immediately turns to territory days & Mid-South Wrestling in particular.

Arrival – Mon April 13th

The convention officially began the night before but I arrived early this morning – and got down to the old Gold Coast Casino around noon shortly after the doors opened.
This being my first year, I didn’t really know what to expect besides I knew their was going to be two banquets, one formal & the other informal honoring a list of wrestlers from my generation & before it. The contact for the club that I had been corresponding with, Morgan Dollar was as he put it “purposefully short on details” other than to reaffirm that “this isn’t a fanfest” and they keep the guest list close to their chests for this very reason.

When I arrived I saw a modest showroom with some wrestlers I recognized showcasing their merchandise & some other interesting wrestling related organizations that I was eager to check out.
Unable to find the press check-in I spoke with Ron Hutchinson – who I learned later is a bit of legend in Canada and is responsible for the early careers of a lot of wrestlers that later became stars in the U.S.
A bit disheartened at first as they couldn’t find my badge but Ron assured me they would have it tomorrow & that I wouldn’t have any problems accessing the areas I needed.
To that I thanked him and made my way around the showroom.

GLOW – The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling:

If you are my age or even a bit younger you totally remember watching GLOW – The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling on Saturday mornings right after the cartoons.
I was a HUGE fan and never missed it.
In fact, I have them to thank for why I was even here! Or even had heard about this organization.
In 2012, a fantastic documentary GLOW: The Story of the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling was released but I didn’t hear about it till November 2014.
In the film it’s established that it was through the Cauliflower Alley Club that they were able to make a reunion possible and the footage of that is the most enjoyable of the film.
So I was then inspired to find out what the CAC was and then holy shit, the floodgates opened – I couldn’t believe this amazing organization has existed for 50 years and how am I just now hearing about it?!?! And then when I heard about the annual gathering & the upcoming one was going to be their bicentennial I had to be here.
During my planning for the trip I had scheduled an interview with one of my fave GLOW girls, Roxy Astor who has become the face of their brand, tirelessly organizing events & making appearances assuring current & future generations will have the opportunity to explore their amazing body of work.

Roxy was so nice, super welcoming and we hit it off instantly – She confirmed our interview for tomorrow & was excited as I was. In fact, her boyfriend was so cool he asked me if I would like to get Lisa Varon (Victoria in WWE) who was being honored this year, on my show to which I quickly gave him an emphatic YES.
As I was awaiting his return & having a nice chat with Roxy, she introduced me to another one of my GLOW faves, Hollywood, who still looks fantastic & was slaying each night with one fabulous outfit after the other.

Easily the most fun I had the entire time I was there was the time I spent with Roxy – We had a freaking blast & one of the most enjoyable interviews I’ve ever done.
You know those extremely rare occasions (especially if your a total weirdo like me) when you meet someone & instantly the volume goes to eleven?
That was Roxy & I –

It was (we thought) the perfect setting as GLOW was filmed here in Las Vegas & I can’t wait till everyone has a chance to hear this interview when it goes live in a few weeks via Itunes on my podcast TrickyKid Radio w/ Roy Turner.
Somewhere in the middle of the interview the staff of the hotel began LOUDLY loading the chairs & tables whose members were either non-English speaking or simply just chose to ignore my vigorously flailing arms in the universal language of STOP.
Others might have reacted differently but Roxy was so cool & we were both doubled-over in laughter.

As a follow-up to the GLOW documentary Roxy produced a live Q&A event via Kickstarter called AfterGlow: The Fan Party that she graciously gifted to me & you can (& should) order yours directly from Roxy here.
A few weeks later in Los Angeles, we had a follow-up where she took me to this ill little diner near her house that was so up my alley where the laughter & bonding continued. I heart you Roxy, your the best ?

Casino Royale 2015 Wrestling Card (Night 2) 

Later that evening their was an actual wrestling show in the main banquet hall, the second of two has their had been one here the previous evening to welcome the convention. And as Mr. Hutchinson gurranteed, I had no problem getting in.

Here were the three matches I witnessed:

A fantastic women’s match w/
Team Canada: Kat Von Heez, Bambi Hall, & Bobby Sharp vs. Team USA: Kiara Dillon, Andrea the Giant, & Short Sleeve Sampson

Steve Anthony vs. Jushin “Thunder” Liger for the National Wrestling Alliance World Junior Heavyweight Championship

“War Pig” Jody Kristofferson vs. Martin Casaus

Jody’s father is Country Music legend & all-around Renassiance Man – Kris Kristofferson who was in attendance in support and was seen all over the convention during the week having a great time.

It was an indie-show naturally with alot of wrestlers I wasn’t familar with, but I love these little shows so much and their were tons of old-school legends in the crowd.
These kind of show usually go long so I knew even though I had other plans for later that I would still get to see plenty of action.

Jake the Snake Roberts Unspoken Word –  Hooters Casino

After getting to see about 90 mins or so of the matches, I headed over to the Hooters Casino for Jake Roberts‘ one-man spoken word show – or in this case as he called it the Unspoken Word.

Opening the show was Jake’s protege & long-time friend Sinn Bodhi (who wrestled as Kizarny in WWE). I had met Jake & Sinn a few months prior in Park City, UT during the Slamdance/Sundance film festivals at a private Royal Rumble watching party at a loft they were staying at along with Scott Hall & Diamond Dallas Page while in town to screen a new documentary about Jake’s recovery The Resurrection of Jake The Snake. I spent time with the group the week I was there & became friendly with them & was invited me to come see this show.

 

Sparsely attended & fucking freezing inside, didn’t matter as this show was so freaking awesome.
I don’t know what the culprit for the super-low attendance (about 25 people) if it was due to competition, lack or promotion, or that it was just simply Monday & it’s a shame too because I’ve seen Jim Ross & Mick Foley’s one-man shows & though I enjoyed them, this was so much better.

Dressed in full Freak Show regala, Bodhi did a nice job warming the crowd with some hilarious tales with well-timed delivery before Jake took the stage.
Looking healthy & in good spirits Jake took to just simply being Jake, who is naturally very funny. As you can imagine this wasn’t a family-friendly environment & Jake took advantage of that to really cut loose, be himself and the results were gold. You’ve heard a million Randy Savage impressions in your life but none more spot-on and side-splitting funny as this, I was literally crying I was laughing so hard. He was honest, candid to the point of almost discomfort & funny as hell – in a word, he killed.

Day 2 – Tues April 14th

In Utah, Jake was somewhat distant, obviously feeling exposed & very vulnerable due to the graphic nature of his hardships that are documented in the film, but here he was home & on a roll & very busy.
The night before I arrived at the first of two wrestling cards he made an appearance

And then at the start of today’s activities, again with Sinn together they participated in a panel that was inspiring, informative & as equally funny & candid
as the show the night before at Hooters Casino.

He was also charged with presenting awards on both nights of the banquets –
Fittingly, later that evening to Sinn who gave a great humble speech, and then the next night he presented an award to Diamond Dallas Page, who produced the documentary at Slamdance that details his olive branch & friendship to Jake that got him back on the right path.

Diamond Dallas Page actually received awards on both nights at each banquet, being the first ever to do so. Being recognized for his wrestling career (presented by Jake) he talked about his heroes, like Jimmy Valiant: “I thought he was the coolest cat ever.” His first attempt at wrestling didn’t work out, so he went onto other things until being pulled back in. “I just can’t believe it happened,”  of his WCW World title win, “You’ll never know if you don’t do this.”

On the previous night, he was rightfully recognized for his impressive body of work of helping others outside the ring by winning the Jason Sanderson Humanitarian Award, this time presented by Scott Hall, who is also profiled in the Ressurection of Jake The Snake.

DDP w/ daughters Kimberly & Brittany and fiance’ Brenda

Since retiring from in-ring compeitiion, as a second act, Dallas has built the fitness empire DDP Yoga, that as detailed in the film, was instrumental in not only Jake & Scott’s recovery & rehabilitation but also receiving wide-spread acclaim in testimonials from other current & former wrestlers as well as everyone from housewives to wounded veterans.
But also, if you know Dallas, he’s just a super swell dude that you would be hard pressed to find anyone to say anything cross about him.

On Day 2 I had the chance to sit down with Dallas for a poolside chat at the Hard Rock Hotel where he had hosted a DDP Yoga workshop the night before.


We had a great, extended talk (that you’ll also be able to hear soon in a future episode of my podcast TrickyKid Radio) about everything from health, to life lessons, our mutual love of the classic film It’s A Wonderful Life & everything in between. I had met & became friendly with Dallas & his equally cool fiance Brenda also back in Utah during Slamdance & was grateful he took the time to invite me over to hang & do my show.

The more informal banquet — now renamed the Bockwinkel Blowout — a number of other presentations were made: to Lisa Marie Varon, Len “The Grappler” Denton, Jimmy “The Mouth of the South” Hart & many others.

Lisa Marie Varon w/ Santana Garrett (left)
Len Denton & Jimmy Hart (right)

Wed – Day  3 (final day)

On (my) third & final day I made time to visit some of the exhibits in the showroom I hadn’t yet had the chance to as a prequel to a panel Dallas was hosting .

Sinn Bodhi & Chris Daniels (left)
Legends Kevin Sullivan & J.J. Dillion

Goldie Digger
& Greg “Oscar” Girard from Men on a Mission
(who did a great, impromptu rap at the first night of banquets that you can see here).

Unfortunately, Dallas had to cancel his panel as a reoccuring throat problem was giving him trouble & he wanted to rest it before the big formal banquet this evening.

The Grand Finale 50 Anniversary Banquet

Lots of the bigger stars & legends made it out to this one tonight. In the first 10 minutes I spotted several Hall-of Famers & many on that same trajectory themselves.
I look left I see Ricky Steamboat, I look left I see Sgt. Slaughter & countless others.

The first-ever Tag Team Award was presented to Demolition, Ax (Bill Eadie) and Smash (Barry Darsow), with Darsow in attendance. Introducing Demolition was Trevor Blanchard, Jimmy Blaze and Dakota Darsow, Barry’s son. “They’re genuine people,” praised Blaze. “Bill was like an uncle to me,” said Barry Darsow, calling up “my mentor, my hero.”
Appreciative of the emotional intro, Barry Darsow thanked his son, and the introduced an audio message from Bill Eadie.

Women’s Awards

Edge Adam Copeland was called upon to introduce his partner Beth Phoenix: “If I don’t get this right, I’m going to get my ass kicked in the hotel room tonight.” He praised her desire to be a pro wrestler and take a chance: “She wasn’t a model, she wasn’t a diva, she was a wrestler.”

The next women’s award went to Gail Kim (my girlfriend’s favorite wrestler) and this is where things get really interesting.
Presenting the award to Kim was Ron Hutchison, the gentlemen I spoke of in the first part of the blog when they didn’t have my badge in order.
I have to admit I took great exception to his introduction for Gail as it was ill-advised and at times downright painful.

Instead of presenting a prestigious award to one of the most gifted athletes the sport has ever seen (regardless of gender) in a room full of people intoxicated with superiority of technique over showmanship he reduces her to some eye candy he spotted in the paper one day.

Reminding everyone that she used to be a Toronto Sunshine Girl, he actually held up newspaper clippings as examples!
I really don’t think Ron thought he was being insensitive, he thought he was being clever but he put himself over instead of her & was attempting to take too much credit for my tastes.

Gail is a total bad ass and took it in stride – She has a reputation for being no-bullshit (which I love). The Knockouts Division was basically “created overnight,” she explained, and was kickstarted by her handing in her resignation out of frustration from not getting to wrestle in TNA. Though gracious and grateful for the award, she did the single coolest thing I saw the entire convention:
Terry Taylor, a former wrestler & Director of Talent Relations for TNA, currently signed to WWE as a trainer was sitting at the table closest to the stage.
I don’t know when the last time these two were in the same room but she slam dunks him by looking him right in the eye thanking him “for firing me all those years ago” as she mentioned her revenge was going on to great prosperity in the sport.

The last two awards were the most prestigious & presented to two men who have given their life to the sport of professional wrestling and let me tell you right now, Larry Henning stole this entire show. His speech for me was the highlight of the entire experience.

Larry Henning

Henning was presented with the Iron Mike Award, the top honor in all of professional wrestling, named after the CAC’s founder Mike Mazurki.
He was so unbelievably entertaining, his honesty so inspiring, his candidness so over the top.
Giving jabs where they were needed, & assessments to last a lifetime.
Calling his wife Irene up to the stage. But he couldn’t hold in another barb: “We’re going to do this today, are we?”  as she winded her way up.

He was having so much fun (& so were we) than he just kept dropping pipebombs until co-emcee JJ Dillon whispered in his ear letting him know his time was up to which Henning shooed him away & said half terse “This is my night, I’m the star of this show so don’t give me no BULLSHIT!!” & fittingly a “Larry! Larry!” chant broke out from the crowd.
He kept us rolling in laughter for a few more minutes when it appeared he was done, he confidently said “I was promised a full house tonight & I am gonna use that as chance to sing to a packed house” and with that he he warbled his way through “Ghost Riders In The Sky.” (“Thank God you learned how to wrestle,” yelled Harley Race.)

Henning & wife were then presented by an original painting of his late son Curt Hennig by Kansas City artist Rob Schamberger.


Their son Kurt who wrested as Mr. Perfect in the WWE in the 1980s was one of my all-time favorites and sadly like a lot these guys, gone way too soon.

Jerry Brisco 

Up next Dillion brought up Terry Funk to introduce Jim Ross to present Jerry Brisco with the Lou Thesz Lifetime Achievement Award.
However, after Henning’s fearlessness & this event had gone on so long now everyone was drunk & wanting to sing a tune of their own. Thankfully the sight of an intoxicated Funk trying to get HIS wife up there to sing HIS song was entertaining (for a minute).

Joining Ross was Wes Brisco, one of Jerry’s two sons.
There were drinking jokes, flatulence that leads to vomiting, colonoscopies on the recommendation of Pat Patterson, and his critique of the steak dinner (and it was more than just needing JR’s BBQ sauce).

“I love Jerry Brisco, your lucky to have five good friends at the end of your wrestling career. And Jerry is my closest friend.
Naturally the moment he got up there Brisco wanted to sing too, launching into a David Allen Coe song adopted to the wrestling business, a tribute in part to all the driving that wrestlers do and the need to stay entertained. He also cracked some jokes about last year’s Lou Thesz Lifetime Achievement Award winner, Michael Hayes, including Hayes’ wrestling skills and flashy attire.
“I’ve been in every high school gym I think in the United States of America,” said Brisco, who is 68 years of age, and been wrestling amateur since the age of eight. Now a talent scout for WWE.

“I’ve heard that term a lot tonight, giving back …” began Brisco, starting to cry as he talked about his late brother, Jack, and his son Wes, and their common love for wrestling.

“Jack was a hero to my son, to me, to many people,” he cried, regaining his composure to take a couple of light-hearted shots at new CAC president Brian Blair, and a story about Blair being ribbed and traveling in a trunk of a car, leading to Blair “dropping trou” and the “greatest moon” in history to a bunch of truckers.

He shared stories of breaking into the business, tagging with Thunderbolt Patterson, wrestling in Australia, turning heel, life in the Florida territory, including the long drives—“Never trust a booker; they don’t know their geography at all”—and stressed the importance of brotherhood and friendship of the wrestling business.

“It’s a journey and we’re fortunate to be on it,” ended Brisco.

________________________________________________________________________________

Closing out the event, CAC President Brian Blair promised big things for next year, and announced that Paul Orndorff, Abdullah the Butcher, the High Flyers (Greg Gagne & Jim Brunzell) would be honored, and that the first Charlie Smith Referee Award would be presented for the first time.

Now let me say this: I was happy to have been in attendance & I thank Dean Silverstone endlessly for making sure I was accommodated & being in the same room with all of these guys I grew up watching on a such a special night for them is something I’ll always cherish.
However, I do feel compelled to give a cautionary tale to any non-wrestler dreaming of attending someday. Like Morgan made clear in the beginning of this post, this is not a fanfest and it’s all the better for it because of that fact. Having said that, this at times can feel very much like your dad or granddad’s poker game that you are not invited to. This is a group of old school guys whose second nature is to protect the business & traditionally adopt a hazing period for newcomers.
It’s a wonderful organization that provides much needed support to wrestlers that I encourage you to support.
Having said that if your doing it just to rub elbows with the wrestlers it’s not gonna go down the way your thinking.

And I get it, it’s supposed to be a night with the boys, not a night with the fans. But as someone that was their in a professional capacity and could care less about autographs I still felt the exclusion, even from some of the other press people that had been covering this for years.

However I chose well for my dining partners. For the non-reserved tables it was first-come first served –

Night 1 I met Sergeant Hazard, a former Canadian wrestler from the old Stampede Wrestling days & his lovely wife.

On Night 2 I sat with Chris Ostrovosky, a Lifetime Member & huge Dodgers fan from Los Angeles who had won the Bowling Tournament that morning.

Thanks again to Dean Silverstone for taking care of me & to the Gold Coast Casino for hosting the event all these years.
Here’s to another 50 years!

Photos – 

Roy Turner
Hard Body
Thomas J.Rude
S. Romer
D. Buckler
Brad McFarlin

WWE Hell in A Cell 2014 (Dallas)

WWE Hell in A Cell – October 26th – American Airlines Center – Dallas, TXMan it sure has been a year filled with wrestling events – After Wrestlemania week and discovering the indie-circuit the floodgates just kinda opened.
For those keeping score tonight is our 11th event of the year and our fourth Pay-Per-View of the year – Are we nerds or what?
I attended the Hell in A Cell event when it was here back in 2010 – Quite a bit has changed since then.

As they ever strive for legitiamacy, the WWE has been holding pre & post wrap up shows a la the NFL and when we arrived to our seats we saw that on this “panel” featured Booker T, Paul Heyman & Alex Riley – These add-on programs as of late have been hosted/moderated by Renee Young who I think is one of the most talented people on their roster in any capacity. She’s also insanely good-looking so being in such close proximity I couldn’t resist taking a creeper shot – hey sue me.

Pre-Show

If you’ve ever ordered one of these PPVs you know that before it goes live at 7pm their’s a 30-minute Pre-Show that serves as something of a commercial for those still on the fence about ordering. They bait you with one or two matches, some easy laughs and tell you the build up to tonight’s matches.
Tonight’s easy laughs came in the form of current tag-team The Miz and Damien Sandow (rebranded Mizdow for this particular gimmick).
I’ve loved Sandow in every capacity he’s been given and this one might one of his best as he’s gotten so over with the crowd as The Miz’s stand-in to his A-List Celebrity gimmick by mimicking everything he does, EVEN THE MOVES THAT ARE BEING EXECUTED ON TO THE MIZ – in hilarious fashion.

1st Match
Mark Henry vs. Bo Dallas

“I have beat Mark Henry four times. That makes me the new world’s strongest man.” —Bo Dallas.

Mark Henry proceeded to beat the stuffing out of Dallas. Don’t think that really counts as a segment. Does it? The two had less than 10 minutes to get in their entrances, a short speech by Dallas and a little match.
Result –  Henry pinned Dallas with the World’s Strongest Slam in a squash.2nd Match –
Dolph Ziggler vs. Cesaro 

Great mat sequence to start the bout. These two guys are so good at still have that underdog feel.
Cesaro brings back the giant swing.

Cesaro’s leaping stomp to the midsection is straight-up brutal and his superplexing his way out of a submission hold was one of the best spots I’ve ever seen.
First “This is awesome.” chant of the night.
Best-of-three falls signified that this was a throwback (which I love) but two of the WWE’s best also mixed in plenty of modern touches and high spots.
Result – Dolph Ziggler pinned Cesaro by reversing a pinfall.
Ziggler pinned Cesaro with the Zig Zag to defend his title.3rd Match –
Nikki Bella vs. Brie Bella (Loser must become the winner’s personal assistant for 30 days)

I’m a big fan of the Divas division, in fact thanks to competitors like AJ Lee & Paige and a few others, it’s my favorite part of the show.
Sadly I witness alot of misogyny at these things and alot of fans view the Divas matches as bathroom breaks, I’m not one of these types.
However, there is currently a pronounced divide in the Divas division that reflects that of real-life social mobility.
Again you have Divas like AJ & Paige that are taken seriously as actual competitors, and then you have a whole other section of girls that still treat it like a sexy sideshow and make like the Kardashians on this ghastly reality show Total Divas.

The Bella Twins are the main stars on Total Divas and their ring work often reflects where their priorities are though I have seen alot of improvement in both sisters recently, especially Brie. However I was still really pleasantly surprised that  they delivered such a legitimately good wrestling match. The action was crisp and stiff, the moves were well-timed and perfectly executed and they got out before something could go wrong.

Result – Nikki defeats Brie
With the loss to Nikki, Brie must now be her sister’s personal assistant for 30 days, otherwise be forced to quit WWE (kayfabe).
Backstage shortly after their match, Nikki kicked off her sister’s 30-day servitude by forcing Brie to lug her baggage, pack her rental car, prep her reservations and deliver a smoothie with very specific ingredients — all of which were cruelly poured onto Brie’s head by Nikki. It’s not going to be a great month for Brie.4th Match
The Usos vs. Goldust & Stardust

Goldust and Stardust are a real throwback team, tagging frequently. You could see them easily in a match against the Rock and Roll Express in 1986 and being an old school guy, I love it.

An incredible sequence ended with Goldust getting a near fall with a spinebuster. Stereo superplexes from the Usos.
Great finishing sequence with the Rhodes brother cheating to win. If you aren’t cheating, you aren’t trying.
Very quietly the Usos have made a case for themselves as one of the great tag teams in WWE history. In the old days that would propel one of them to singles glory. Not sure, however, which of the two brothers has more potential.Of course, it’s easy to look good in with Goldust. The artist formerly known as Dustin Rhodes is one of the best wrestlers in the entire world. He does the little things that hold a match together and never seems to be in the wrong place.
Result – Goldust pinned Jimmy Uso with a Final Cut after Stardust kicked his leg out from underneath him. 

5th Match
John Cena vs. Randy Orton (Hell in a Cell)

Some matches are about the nuances, the little things making all the difference between winning and losing. This was not one of those matches and quite frankly without the Cell I wouldn’t have cared about this match at all.

There was nothing subtle here. I enjoyed this match, but it was like an echo of matches before it. Everything felt familiar. That’s bound to happen when you’ve wrestled 84 previous times on television.
Result –  John Cena pinned Randy Orton with an AA through a table.

6th Match
Sheamus vs. The Miz 

Mizdow selling moves that Miz gets hit with will never get old.

Mizdow mimicking Miz as Sheamus forces him to mime the “YMCA” dance was hysterical.
Mizdow has made Miz must-see television. I don’t think anyone has ever said that before. It may run its course at some point but right now it’s joyous fun.
Result – Sheamus pinned The Miz with a Brogue Kick.7th Match
Rusev vs. The Big Show

This for me would be the definition of a bathroom break – I could give two shits about either performer’s current storyline, nor do either hold anything that’s ever captured my attention for more than 10 seconds (other than Lana that joins Rusev to the ring).

The ‘ol morality play of Nationalists that has always been a big staple in Professional Wrestling.  If the Big Show can’t defend our national honor, who can?
Result – Rusev made Big Show tap out to The Accolade.

8th Match
AJ Lee Vs. Paige (Divas Title Match)

For me, this is what I came for and why I bought tickets – AJ Lee & Paige are my No. 1 & 2 faves on the roster regardless of gender.
AJ and Paige were never really portrayed as friends but since their the best two in the division it makes the most sense to have them face each other. However as a storyline is concerned it needed to be built up before it could be torn down.

Nice tornado DDT from AJ.AJ and Paige work a weird spot on the barricade to set up Paige hitting her head. Alicia Fox then “helped” Paige back in the ring. Paige smacks her around after the match for the mistake.
Result – AJ Lee made Paige submit to the Black Widow

AJ Lee is the best talent on the roster, the best female competitor in my opinion to ever to do it (and quite frankly, she has to be the most attractive person currently breathing).
9th Match – (Main Event)
Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins (Hell in A Cell)Dean Ambrose comes out looking as creepy as ever. He looks like a dude who would hit on your girlfriend at a bar even though you’re standing right there.
They had done a great job of building the match over the last few weeks, getting Mick Foley (who is synonmous with HIAC) involved suggesting that they were going to attempt to pull something off like Foley did back in the day.
And it was well needed because in recent years the term Hell in A Cell has kinda lost its luster.

A) Because Foley set the bar so high.
B) Because they seem like just regular cage matches as of late.

So I had a feeling that the whole “loose canon” gimmick of Ambrose was gonna get it back there somehow and when he started to climb the Cell to start the match like Foley did in 1998, I knew we were in for something special.

Seth Rollins’ making his lackeys, Mercury and Noble, go up and get Ambrose down.

Rollins sneaks up behind Ambrose, and the three work him over on top of the cage. Ambrose rallies to suplex Noble on the unforgiving steel.
Ambrose dropped a Randy Savage-style elbow off the top rope through a table, and it was only like the eighth-best spot of this crazy match. That’s the kind of match it was
Corporate Kane sprays Ambrose with a fire extinguisher, allowing Rollins to rally with a powerbomb through a table. Payback is going to suck for Mr. Ambrose I bet.
Near fall after a brutal clothesline and a briefcase shot. That’s a heck of a near fall.

Suddenly the lights go out, mumbo jumbo is spoken and………

And then Bray Wyatt appeared as an apparition/hologram to interfere with the match!!

Rollins wins, and the show ends with Wyatt delivering Sister Abigail to Ambrose.
Result Seth Rollins pinned Dean Ambrose after Bray Wyatt interfered.

I loved it, I thought the show was great, and I loved the crazy ending. All in all this was a good experience, we had great seats that we didn’t have to sell an organ to get, the crowd didn’t annoy me like they usually do, we saw AJ Lee and the show was strong throughout. Good times.

Fun Fun Fun Fest 2011 w/ Slayer, Public Enemy & More (Nov/2011)

Ok so after an incredibly busy last few months, I was now headed back down to Austin for the Fun Fun Fun Fest. These always look totally awesome and have such an insane and random lineup and yet I’d never been to one until now. The lineups always looked good but there was always something in the way etc. But with the promise of Public Enemy, Henry Rollins, Kool Keith, and Slayer all in one weekend, I was ready for action.

2011 Fun Fun Fun Fest – Nov 4th-6th – Auditorium Shores – Austin, TX

Erin has a house in Austin and actually claims Austin as home when asked and she’s always excited about going down there when we do, so the drive down was actually really fun. Her having a house down there makes it super easy and I was looking forward to a great weekend.

Nov 4th

I get in the guest line and get our wristbands and to my surprise the guy behind the desk hands me a shitload of free drink tickets. He’s wearing a Boston Red Sox hat and says that we met at a Never Got Caught/Clutch show a few years ago. Thanks man!

It was after 7pm before we even got there but the festival had started at noon – the only act I wanted to see that was left was Public Enemy.
Last month, I was at the All Tomorrow’s Parties event in Asbury Park where we saw PE put on one of the best shows of the year and threatened to steal the entire festival.
So needless to say I would have already been looking forward to the show but after what we saw just a few weeks ago, the anticipation was even higher.

They have the stages set up in pairs right next to each other, so that the minute one stage stops, the next one can begin immediately so its continuous non-stop music – one of the better ideas that the Warped Tour has brought to the table.

We were actually standing directly behind the two stages watching Four Tet do his thing –

 

 

We were actually pinned between this trailer that was the dressing room and the back of the stage when a few things of mention happened:

One –  was that though we really enjoyed PE in New Jersey, one thing was that the soundcheck was excruciating – It went on for almost as long as their set and was led by what I can only imagine is some relative of Chuck D’s that he needed to give a job to. This older, extremely over-bearing man with zero time-management skills who’s idea of getting the crowd ready was to scream “AAAAHIGHT??” – About one million times.
Well while we are watching Four Tet, sadly for him the soundboard was to his right while PE and annoying stage mgr were soundchecking to his left.
PE’s stage mgr was actually shouting orders to the soundman at the board thru Four Tet while he was performing on stage!
I couldn’t believe it – Four Tet, a super nice guy would occasionally (and incredulously) shoot a look over at PE’s stage mgr with a confused smile as if to say:  “Can you not see that I’m actually in the middle of my set right now dude?”.

Two – While we are watching this, again its a tight squeeze and only one person can pass between the back of the stage and the dressing room & see that Chuck D was squeezing his way through.

Three – So after Four Tet wraps and again so that the music can be seamless PE is about to start and we are now standing on the side of the stage a mere feet from where they will be performing, when suddenly the entire stage/backstage area is cleared as if the President is coming to watch PE (maybe he was? – I could see that) – Instead it wasn’t the President, it was actor Ryan Gosling and company. Sadly, their will be much more about him as this post progresses.

Public Enemy

Ok so now we are kinda half in the photo pit and half in the crowd and let met tell you something, Austin is passionate about their politics and they are equally passionate about their Hip-Hop and now here were the kings of the game ready to get down. Their was nearly a mini-riot before they even took the stage and when they hit all fucking hell broke loose.

I didn’t know if they were gonna stick to what they have been doing this year which is all of Fear of a Black Planet but the show certainly started out that way.
The effect was briefly transformational, Chuck brought the crowd back into the present by referencing and praising the nationwide “Occupy” movement. Flavor Flav followed that by thanking the crowd for making him the biggest reality television star ever. Thud.
In effect completely loosing all of the momentum that the first three jams had whipped everyone up in.
At one point he brought his teenage Godson up there who he commanded to freestyle rap on the spot – It appeared that Flav might have only met this kid once before and it was probably earlier today and to please his famous Godfather he might have mentioned that he “rapped”. The fear on this poor kid’s face that Flav was throwing his teenage ass to the wolves, was almost as cringe-inducing as the one “rap” the kid actually made which was:

“I came to the fest to have fun, because I’m Flavor Flav’s Godson”

The crowd moaned but clearly felt for this kid –

In spite of this and other Flav shenanigans, the set was not only genuine but it also extended the PE political mythos further into the group’s third decade.
Sending everyone home happy with the belief that the hit parade they’d just seen was part of something far more meaningful. Whether it was that or not was almost entirely immaterial. Friday’s headlining spot was built on the idea of Public Enemy as a relevant and provocative cultural constant, and if you went into the night holding that stock you certainly were not’t in selling mode at its close. In that view as well as most others, it was a success.

Setlist –

Contract On The World Love Jam
Welcome To The Terrordome
B Side Wins Again
911 Is A Joke
Meet The G That Killed Me
Show Em Watcha Got
Bring The Noise
Don’t Believe The Hype
Cold Lampin’ With Flavor
Can’t Truss It
Night Of The Living Baseheads
He Got Game/Anti-Negro Machine
Burn Hollywood Burn
Black Is Back
Timebomb
Shut Em Down
Rebel Without A Pause
Fight The Power

Epilogue – Now during this, the other main attraction (and perhaps for some the main reason for coming) was that Danzig was staging something of a career retrospective and even more importantly something of the closest you will get to a Misfits reunion by including a set of Misfits songs to be performed with famed Misfits’s guitarist Doyle Von Frankenstein.
I mention this because sadly this festival will be remembered mostly for Danzig’s complete and total meltdown (in a history of his meltdowns) and besides Ryan Gosling, this is all everybody talked about for the rest of the festival. Apparently he had made some really weird demands involving soup that even when they were met didn’t prevent the show from melting down and the Misfits portion never happening. Lots of soup jokes followed the rest of the weekend.

You can read festival organizer Graham account of the situation here –

Now let me say this – Even if PE weren’t playing I would have skipped this – As completely blasphemous as this will sound, I do not, nor have I ever cared even an ounce about anything to do with Glen Danzig, not even for a second. I have never owned a Misfits record, nor do I care to, I couldn’t even tell you the names of any of their songs if Metallica hadn’t covered several of them. That is how completely uncool and unpunk I am and what a total square I am, and I could give two shits who knows it.
However, I do know that the band holds great importance to many many people, and I’m sure it was more than one person’s decision to come based upon this appearance and to have Danzig shit all over it is really lame and unfair to them.

After-show –

Kool Keith – Empire Automotive

One of the cool things about this fest too is much like the ACL Fest the organizers take advantage that Austin is the live music capital of the world and host after shows all over the city. I love Kool Keith and was glad he was booked to do his own late-night weirdness in his own setting, instead of on a big stage in the middle of the day. And let me tell you something, this show couldn’t have been any weirder even for him.
Since we had only seen really one act we were still roaring to go, and even if I was tired I would have made the effort to see Kool Keith.
So much weirdness, where do I begin? First of all it was weird/typically Austin cool that he was playing in an auto body shop.
Secondly, when we got there which was around 10:30pm he wasn’t going on for like three hours haha.
I had wanted to see Trash Talk but they had just finished and when I asked the merch guy who was coming on before Keith, he turned into this caricature of a human spouting slang so cartoonish I thought I was being Punk’d.
So for three hours we sat in this body shop waiting for the weirdest (and arguably the most talented) MC of all time to come on. During which time we had beer spilled on us which seemed like a half a dozen times, but Erin and I were actually in good talks and good spirits.
Then finally Kool Keith took the stage –

 

 

Let me tell you something, I’ve seen him perform on every tour since the first Dr. Octagon LP and so I have seen some really brown shows of his, but this one takes the proverbial shit cake. I have seen him literally kill onstage before (Coachella 2004) and I’ve seen him start selling cdrs from his back pocket in the middle of the show (Dallas 2005) to many other examples (and we had also just seen him at the Ultramagnetic MCs reunion in Asbury Park) but this time he was downright scary, but no less entertaining and funny, until he wasn’t.
He had Kutmaster Kurt DJ’n and he came out as usual, but then it was a mess from there on out. Kurt would just play something, Keith would rap a known song over it, and then if he didn’t feel like finishing it, he would just abandon it, leaving Kurt to catch up. This has value as theirs probably not a rapper alive that can effortlessly freestyle like that and just move and shift at will. On the other hand its execution feels like the ramblings of an insane homeless man.
We enjoyed some of it, when he was doing stuff like Get off my elevator and alot of the Dr. Doom tracks – but what we were enjoying more was watching people’s reactions and then watching them leave.
Not just because of the late hour, by the time he got to the real dirty stuff like Sex Style and Girl let me touch you there people were dropping like flies.
It seemed to have no rhyme or reason or no end. We even saw the guys from Workaholics walk out shaking their heads, but we stayed till the end.

Nov 5th

Finally get parked and get inside to start the day and the first thing we see is a wrestling ring set up right in the middle of the field with a match in full swing taking place.

Anarchy Championship Wrestling

That was something else I was loving about this festival was it kind of had a carny sleaze to it – It wasn’t glossed up like Lollapalooza, and the randomness of having wrestling and other events really worked. Not to mention, I’m a huge fan of wrestling –

 

The action was sloppy of course but so much fun, and it was great that you knew that you were surrounded by people that were probably being exposed to wrestling in this capacity for the first (and some surely the last) time. While Erin was taking pics of the action suddenly this dude walks up to me who is dressed like Rayden from the fucking Mortal Kombat game and it standing oddly and very close to my face. Because of the wind and dust, the place was over run with dustdevils and for which the hipsters were remedying themselves with by wearing fashionable bandannas around their faces like they were about to hold up a bank in the Old West. Rayden was wearing this obscuring his face and his gay ass Rayden hat – when he pulls his bankrobber gear down and sporting a shit eating grin to my reaction of “Who the fuck are you pal?” look on my face to reveal that it was my old pal Justin – for which if you knew him this was par for the course.
Good times –
This was just the start of The Day of Running into Musicians from Dallas Day – This was followed by as were walking over to the backstage area, we were perusing the wares that were for sale in the local villagers market they had setup and I desperately needed a pair of sunglasses, when we ran into Mike Graff and Peter Schmidt, two accomplished musicians from Dallas.
Graff was the guitarist for the greatest band that you have never heard, Course of Empire – seriously one of the best bands ever – that had a major label deal and the label had no idea what to do with them and they faded into obscurity.
Schmidt was in Funland with drummer Will Johnson that went on to become Centro-Matic and Clark Vogeler is now the guitarist for the Toadies.
I practically worshiped Graff in high school and we have had a great rapport for 20 years so it was really good to see him and catch up.
Speaking of the Toadies, right after this we ran into my buddy Todd who sings and also plays guitar in that band and had a good laugh as always.
Later that night we ran into and had a great laugh with the always funny and interesting, Wayne Coyne.Ryan GoslingAs if I give two shits, I wouldn’t be accurately describing the experience of the festival if I didn’t mention the mania over Ryan Gosling. I mentioned earlier about how we was responsible for us having to leave the backstage area of the Public Enemy to make room for his royal douchyness. The way that we exchange information is so insane these days that by Day 2 of the festival their was a Tumbler account documenting his every move at the festival.The minute we got backstage the first thing we see is Gosling and company being followed by a film crew that we would later learn was Austin filmmaker Terrence Malick shooting some candid footage of Gosling for an upcoming project –

 Unbeknown to me at the time, but the girl next to him (looking like the constant filming is giving her a migraine) is Roony Mara – who went on to play Lisbeth Salander in the English adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo – I just thought she was just some super babe worthy of Gosling’s status. I would actually meet her at this same spot four months later unexpectedly during SXSW – .

Ok movie stars and super babes aside, what caught my attention was out of the corner of my eye I spot true royalty. I was having a conversation with Franki Chan while Erin was in the bathroom when I spot Joe Lally.
I knew that our tardiness had all but caused us to miss his set, but I had to ask him anyway – so I approached and he confirmed that I had indeed missed it for which I started cursing the sky and we had a good laugh and a nice talk. Joe is one of the coolest ever.

Wugazi

Ok so when we ran into Joe Lally, I just assumed that he was on his way to see this thing called Wugazi, an apparent mash-up of Fugazi songs and the raps of the Wu-Tang Clan, who were actually billed higher than Joe Lally, a member of Fugazi himself. Not that I thought Joe would have any interest in this but I joked with him that it would probably make him look like a dickhead if he didn’t at least have a small peek and then I teased him about his curiosity.
He seemed to only have heard of it and knew that they were playing but convinced me he had really no idea that they were about to go on 15 feet away.
So we walk over there, where we stayed all of about 3 mins and Joe left before I did – the picture below should do the talking as to why –

 

 

This is something that could only exist today – two extremely white, trust fund looking douche bags, who are able to convince the blogosphere that their idea is “genius” without ever having to prove how solid their work is and suddenly the cool factor gets them billed higher than an actual member of Fugazi. Unacceptable – their work was not solid and the samples they used were weak and the whole thing looked really embarrassing.

Donald Glover

Another attraction of this increasingly weird festival is they also had a tent dedicated to name comedy acts. All I’ve been hearing this year is about Donald Glover as the heir to the throne. That throne being the lineage of Foxx, Cosby, Pryor, Murphy, Rock, Chapelle – and I’m a committed fan of all of these heavyweights so I was very curious and thought it would be fun so we went over to check it out. I knew that his guy also has a rap group that was gonna be performing later so I was a bit leery of him.

 

 

The assumption is that fans of one medium think the other is unwatchable, or the historical pattern is that the artist’s talent resides heavily in one camp and the other “experiment” is hard to watch for everyone. What sets Glover apart is the fact that he is still an unproven fresh face in many respects, and that seems to give him limitless ambition. It’s clear that he takes both sides of his career very seriously. Serious dedication to comedy gives him a reputation as a very silly individual, which eventually ends up as defensive lyrics in his songs about how “hard”’ he is as a rapper. It’s a fine and difficult line that Glover treads sometime skillfully, to varying degrees of success. Seeing him perform for 30 mins in a tent in the middle of the day doesn’t even remotely make me an expert, but I think its fair to say, to that though I appreciate his new school attitude and ways of doing things, his material just isn’t that solid and it feels like it will date it to be trend happening now and overall his comedy seems a little too hip for me.

Dan Deacon

Though I’ve seen Dan Deacon numerous times and somewhat enjoyed it, the only reason we were over here to see this was because:
a) Their wasn’t anything else going on at the moment that we cared about
b) This stage is closest to the backstage refreshments and couches.
c) The act that we did wanna see was going on after him.

I was talking about this the other day, and finally figured something out – Among the colorfully dressed hipster types and their ironic behavior and painfully white guys using hip-hop slang and unnecessary beards, the one thing they are trying to achieve the most is a “moment” – That “moment” can only come when someone gives them a reason for everyone to jump up and down in unison in what looks like a controlled riot – that is what they are after, and even if they band SUCKS, and trust me, most of them do – as long as they are having the “moment” that will make a great pic for the social networks of choice they are happy.
Be it at a Girl Talk show, or Matt and Kim – as long as their cinematically jumping, they are happy.

 

 

This is the only way to fully explain the popularity of someone like Dan Deacon – Here is a guy that is fat, bald, really ugly and dresses like he’s autistic – and doesn’t sing or even play an instrument as far as I can tell – just sets up some gadgets on a table with loops from a Casio keyboard and blasts them though a speaker and that’s the show. But it gives everyone a reason to jump and have the moment and the potential of chaos is enough to attract people to watch and incite it themselves.
To make it even sexier, Deacon apparently doesn’t like stages to make it even more “I’m on your level,” , unconventional and pushes the potential for mayhem even higher – so while we were actually standing on stage – Deacon was setting up his table right on the other side of the barricadeThe sound for his set was atrocious, and you could tell it was killing him. And by extension, it killed me. He had the chance to get the crowd going on a few occasions, but overall a complete waste of time, other than it gave us a chance to actually stand on stage and get a great view. I looked to my right and their was fucking Gosling, dude was everywhere.

Kool Keith (substituting for Rakim)

Ok so we got word an hour or so ago that unfortunately Rakim, one of the acts I was most looking forward to seeing, had broken his foot and wasn’t going to be performing today. That sucks for all involved but holy shit as a replacement since he was in town (see above) – its Kool Keith to the rescue!

 

 

I had even remotely recovered from the weirdness of show last night, and seeing him in the middle of the day was as bizarre as he is but we were ready for more (I think) – but I don’t think he was ready for much more than either a nap or more drugs. Same as last night, Kurt just basically solo’d on the turntables and Keith would just rap a few bars of whatever song came into his head. Being one of the most, if not the most prolific rapper of all time, these lines could come from any of the staggering 50+ albums he’s released over the past 20 years. We got a bit of East West Hustlers and Blue Flowers that we didn’t get last night, but the only fully cohesive song he did at both shows was the Ultramagnetic Mc’s staple Poppa Large.
Right after he performed we ran into my buddy Igor, who took most of the pictures on this blog entry. He’s obviously a photographer and was running from stage to stage, so we only hung for a sec, but since he doesn’t drink he did give me his drink tickets. Thanks buddy.

Childish Gambino

Ok so as mentioned earlier, we had seen Donald Glover’s comedy set and now it was time for his rap act. For a guy who, a year ago, was mostly known—if at all—as part of the ensemble of a low-rated sitcom Community, the crowd hyped to see Gambino was staggering.

There are a couple reasons for it. Donald Glover, is an Internet phenomenon, propelled by social media savvy and a non-stop work ethic that has him crossing into many different worlds online.

 

 

We were back in that same position we have been last night squeezed behind the stage and dressing rooms where we met Chuck D. All in all is was actually pretty good, I went into pretty skeptical and I didn’t leave thinking they were any more legit than I did before I saw them, but the musicianship of the band was solid and the execution of the whole show was actually quite decent and enjoyable.

Lykke Li

Making the most of the day since we really only saw once act and taking advantage of our Access passes, we then ran through the backstage thoroughfare up to the side of the stage to see Lykke Li who I am a huge fan of.
More than anyone else we saw over the weekend, her use of visuals (monochrome outfits, thick smoke, billowing curtains and percussion as theater) to enhance her performance really showed forethought and planning—

 

 

Li also transformed Dance Dance Dance from debut album Youth Novels into an awesome drumstick battle with a bandmate, which the crowd ate up. It was a rare moment that one noticed the band, who generally stood back and stayed far out of Ms. Li’s spotlight. As the show pulled into the closing with hit Little Bit,it was obvious some numbers had been cut due to the late start—most notably Love Out Of Lust, which was sorely missed.
Li has such a distinct mix of beauty, showmanship and style. I’ve seen her a half a dozen times before and though you may not be able to tell from the above picture how much she tries to downplay her beauty, always wearing these long shapeless over-size robes, but seriously is their any real chance of hiding of freaking ridiculously hot she is? – One of my fave shows of the whole weekend.

The Damned

If only Danzig had stuck around to take notes while British Punk band The Damned showed them how to command a stage and address their audience. Frontman Dave Vanian was dressed to impress with slicked hair, shades, and leather gloves to go with his polished duds. The band sounded amazing, and even the young ones in the crowd were pulled in for the set. The music was great, and the commentary was too, with Dave and Captain Sensible poking ruthless fun at Danzig and his soup.

 

To drive home the “how uncool I am” narrative from before, I can’t think of this band without thinking about this: Summer of 1998 I had my first love – she was (and I’m sure probably still is) miles ahead of me in everything. She was a punk rawker into all the perverse cool shit, while my soundtrack that summer consisted of a steady diet of shit no one will ever think is cool like King’s X, 311, and Prince during his depressed phase. She was super into the Damned and the fact that they were true English punks and not mainstream in America like the Sex Pistols made it all the sexier.
We made a pilgrimage to legendary indie-record store Bill’s in Dallas where he charged her an exuberant amount of money for this one record, that some fat friend of hers stole that she wanted to replace. On the way home we also realized amid her excitement for getting the record that he never gave her back her change, in effectively doubling the price of the record! – We joked that we should have taken advantage of Bill’s homosexuality and had me purchase the record instead. I of course had never even heard of this band before that day which later soon contributed to her exit. I used to joke when people would ask me why we broke up I would reply “cause I have bad taste, and I don’t know anything about Crass” ( that and course my bad hygiene,which is a contradiction in terms if you think about it) – But hey, I didn’t know anything about her other favorite band, Ween, either and look how THAT turned out – Hang in there kids.

Major Lazer

….and then we walk just a few yards over from something tried and true to something new and fun, but really, really stupid. That’s the beauty of a festival like this. The ridiculousness was all in place, even amplified – more dancers, more songs, the Major Lazer in question still sports a bleached Mohawk and yells ridiculous catch phrases. “IS ANYONE DRUNK TONIGHT? WE’RE GONNA GET YOU DRUNK TONIGHT!”

 

 

 

 

I almost feel silly for criticizing it; Major Lazer has always been an entity that requires a specific state of mind and a specific place. I saw them at Coachella a few years ago and it was one of the most ridiculous and fun things of the whole weekend. I was clearly not in either, and as it wore on it became more annoying than entertaining because at that point I think I had reached musical saturation, and that’s the whole point right?.

…and you would think I would have – as this point of the night we had seen 7 bands, two wrestling matches, several movie stars, a comedian and enough dust covered hipsters to last a lifetime. But when you get locked in the tendency is to take it as far as you can, at least that always tends to be my tendency – see what I did there?

Aftershow –

Mates of State – The Parish

Ok, I always do this, and its so stupid – I convince myself that I have to do certain things, or therefore I’m lame and old, or just lame whatever. I get these stupid ideas in my head and make decisions because of them, no matter their practicality. This would be a perfect example.
Given all that I had been through in the past 24 hrs – drove from Dallas, saw Public Enemy and then a Kool Keith after-show, and all that we had seen and done today, it would be more than fair to just go home and go to bed.
But oh no, their was an after-show and so I kept pushing. One logical said that could be said is that it seems that when we are out doing stuff, her insanity begins to decrease, but left to the idle playground of the goddamn devil than all hell breaks loose, so I wanted to stay out as long as we could.
The other side of that is that, I don’t care one bit about Mates of State. I’ve never owned one record, couldn’t’ tell you one song and the few times I have seen them they were painfully average and boring.

 

 

So why was I here?, so fatigued I could barely stand – but soldiering on just so I could get to the finish line so that I could be satisfied that there wasn’t anything left to do that we hadn’t done. It’s a real character flaw of mine. We finally leave there when they finish and mercifully get home around 2am.Henry Rollins officiates wedding

Though I’m from the Dallas/Fort Worth and I don’t know them at all – I had heard that Henry Rollins was gonna be hosting the nuptials of Dallas-area residents and fest attendees Steven Hart and Page King prior to his show later tonight. This I had to see.

During the brisk and mildly absurd but ultimately touching ceremony, Rollins addressed the couple on the importance of the day before they exchanged their vows.

“Right now the two of you are surrounded and vastly outnumbered by people who want nothing more than your great happiness, and it’s safe to say many of them want for your happiness more than their own,” Rollins said. “With 7 billion people in the world and more than 200 million people in America the chances of you two intersecting are frankly against you. The fact that you found each other borders on being a miracle.”

A brief exchange of vows, ring exchange and first kiss was followed by a serenade by Internet sensation the Sexy Sax Man, who earned plenty of laughs and cheers from the crowd that was still applauding the new couple. This festival is freaking awesome.

Del the Funky Homosapien

Being the life-long student of Hip-Hop that I am and a long time fan of Del, I’ve never seen one of his solo shows. Proud to say that I have seen the Hieroglyphics as well as Deltron 30/30 but never just him doing his solo stuff. So I was very excited to check it out.

 

 

Two things that made this quite a bit of a disappointment for me was, one – again I LOVE hip-hop, and yes I tend to gravitate almost exclusively to the more intellectual based, worldly consciousness stylings of groups like the aforementioned Public Enemy and what is known as “underground hip-hop” which is silly, like Blackalicious, Juraasic 5, Busdriver, etc.
However the one thing that embarrasses me about the whole thing is their is an air of elitism that has nothing to do with me and socially it really gets on my nerves. Its so typical and boring that most of these groups play to nerdy, mostly white male (like me) audiences. But where I differ is I hate when they get on that “This is REAL hip-hop, this is the real shit” – and think they are better or somehow evolved than Lil Wayne or Drake. I personally can’t stand the music of Lil Wayne or Drake but its not because my tastes are so sophisticated because I’m so enlightened to what Hip-Hop really is.
I’m a white dude from Texas – how would this ever qualify me to the authentication of an originally all-black and completely original art form started in the South Bronx before I was born?
I just like what I like and leave the bullshit to the bullshitters, so that’s why it was disappointing when Del went off on some elitist non-sense for most of the time he was on stage.
The other was, I don’t know what she had taken or how much of it but whatever it was it had completely taken hold as every few verses I would look over at her and she was struggling to stand with her mouth wide open, eyes in the back of her head and completely unable to hold it together.
Even when I tried to hold her up she kept falling to the ground and gesticulating in ways that were beyond her control. It was terrifying, embarrassing, and I had no idea what to do about it. People were moving out her way like the casualty she was, while others were looking at me incredulously like “What the fuck is wrong with her?”.
I should have just gotten us out of there right then, but I was so disgusted with her and all that she had put me through and now the thing I had been waiting for all weekend, the 1-2-3 punch of Rollins/Posehn/Slayer were all up next and I perhaps selfishly, I wasn’t gonna let her bullshit blow it for me.I got her some water and we sat down for a bit. Thankfully she loves Henry Rollins and so I was hoping that this was gonna hold and keep her attention but having to stand and listen to someone talk for an hour is an undertaking in any condition.

Henry Rollins

We get over there and it felt like forever while we were standing there. People around us knew she was in bad shape and it was embarrassing and I had this fear that Rollins was gonna come out right as she finally nose-dived and then he would know it too and there would be a big scene.
We were right up front, (she is very short) and of course right when he starts, what looked like the local basketball team shows up and decided to stand right in front of us. I was aggressive with them and I didn’t care. Finally Rollins takes the stage and things are looking up.

 

 

 

 

Here are some of the topics he broached: travelings, North Korea, Blue Velvet, scaring the bejesus out of Dennis Hopper, John McCain, drugs, politics, life, longing, and “Life is short. You’ve got to get as many of these stories as you can under your cap.” In his parting words to the audience, where he enthused the importance of the contributions from each generation, he also imagined a world of “24-7 p-funk, Ramones block party.”
Freaking awesome as always.

Brian Posehn

Though we only caught the last half of Posehn’s 30 minute set – it was funny as hell and I was certainly in the need of a good laugh. Feeling inspired as always after seeing Rollins, it was great to laugh, if only for a sec before Slayer. I was also enjoying that, if you don’t know already that comedian Brain Posehn is a HUGE metal fan and one of its biggest ambassadors outside of the Metal community. He was a regular on the Sarah Silverman show and other Comedy Central programming. So this had to have been a freaking DREAM for him – instead of doing his bit in small two-drink minimum comedy club in some Midwestern city, here he was performing like a rock star on the biggest stage of huge festival in front of 10k people, in effect opening for Slayer. How fucking cool is that?

 

 

He talked a bit about that and did this great bit about ICP fans and a few other jokes I had heard him tell. And then he finished with a quip about masturbation and gave the horns and said “Now let’s get ready for Slayer!!”
Sounds good –

Slayer

There was a genuine roar from the crowd as the band—obscured on stage for the very beginning of the set by a huge white sheet upon which they projected pentagrams—launched into the brutal opening riff of the title track from 2009’s World Painted Blood. It’s okay, guys. Slayer is here.

 

 

The band’s set proceeded to dish out absolutely, non-stop, pummeling metal, because that is what Slayer is and does. If you wanted anthems of destruction and odes to Satan, then Slayer is your band.
Slayer is a singular, iconic artist. It’s more appealing now than ever, to more people than ever, to hear a band that just does what they do without any of those other concerns.
Slayer does not care how y’all are doing’ out there tonight, Austin. (Singer Tom Araya did make a “Are you having Fun Fun Fun yet” joke early on)

To drive home where I was mentally, you would think I would have OD’d on Slayer by now. This was my third show this year and my fifth in 13 months and have seen at least another dozen shows or more over the years, but I needed this. Being objective about the actual performance would be impossible for this night, normally I stand in the back and rawk a bit but overall I’m an analyzer, I don’t go for that “This is where you let your aggressions out” bullshit – but I needed an outlet for my frustrations so desperately, and holy shit is their a better therapist than a fucking Slayer show?
Yes there where other bands there that I knew and liked, but I needed something that I knew every word to – and let me tell you something, I rawked harder than I ever have in my life, and perhaps more than anyone there. You know that guy that you kinda fear because he’s so into it? That was me – I even almost jumped into the pit –
Saw this in the bathroom backstage –

 

 

We finally get out of there and instead of heading the Beauty Bar for Diplo‘s after-show party, I had to get her home and I was so beat I was ready myself.